Friday, September 16, 2005

15

My Israeli adventure is officially 15 years old today. Feckin' hell.

I came here as a lanky, pasty 21 year old, hell bent on enjoying myself for a month or two on a kibbutz and then heading back to England. Little did I know that Tel Aviv would ensnare me, grab me by the short and curlies, shake me like a polaroid, and then gently put me to one side...

So, in honour of this momentous occasion, I've created a list of 10 things that Israel has tried to divide and conquer without success... of course, for an impression of the average Israeli, think the exact opposite of the following:

  • I indicate when I change lanes.
  • I call before visiting a neighbour or friend.
  • I close my mobile before entering the cinema.
  • I let other drivers enter my lane if they indicate.
  • I use 'Excuse me' (in Hebrew) when initially talking to a total stranger (e.g., asking for the time/directions).
  • I call my parents once in a blue moon.
  • I wear t-shirts and shorts when it's a freezing 20C (think: Israeli winter=English summer).
  • I listen before politely offering my opinion.
  • I have never been to a barbeque on a traffic island.
  • I go to a pub to drink beer (not coke, not tea, you bunch o' posers).

And, just as a timely reminder, this is one of the reasons why Tel Aviv grabbed me:

Click me to fully appreciate my lushness!

Tel Aviv, this morning, 6.30am, don't ask...

Been thinking amidst a series of flashbacks, I've got a few stories to tell...for example, the story about my arriving in Israel and within my first hour here I'd already met the girl I was going to spend the next 6+ years with. I might just bore you with a snippet or two in the near future...