So that was 2009...

...and it was quite an eventful year for us anglosaxies. The biggest event of the year happened in the final month, a certain new addition to the ranks at anglosaxy castle. Here he is, little JuniorMarkII, otherwise known as Daniel.

He has brought a certain amount of action to the house, and, er, a few sleepless nights. But he's a great little kid, pretty relaxed and doing great.

We also moved out of Tel Aviv. Oh yes, The City That Never Sleeps is now having truly sleepless nights, as the Galilee welcomed us with open arms into the cradle of moshav living. We moved two months ago, and from what I've seen so far, I like it A LOT. The kids are having a great time too, and the missus is very happy, so all's good...

Work-wise I haven't stepped back into the pits of a corridor for quite a few months. I've been doing freelancing gigs here and there, and building up the world famous igoogledisrael.com (see the best posts of 2009 here). I also worked on something over the summer connected with Twitter, but thanks to some stupid, stupid developers, I ended up wasting way too much time on it without any real results. Never mind. Unfortunately, it looks like I might have to step back into the depths of corridordom, and with an offer on the table from a particularly big company, I might have to take it. Tis all about the money innit.

Anyway, this blog will continue, just for the 3 people who sometimes drift by. Posts won't be regular but because Google loves this site, it will get updated. For those of you who understand, then great, for those of you who don't, just ignore this paragraph.

Happy New Year to you and yours!

Flush

...with cash we are. Well, with a few cheques that'll help pay off the mortgage to be precise. We signed a contract yesterday with the new tenants. The yuppie couple I spoke about here didn't want in the end, and the gay couple decided it wasn't big enough for their purposes, so we ended up advertising again. Up popped another batch of eager hopefuls, this time it's another yuppie-type couple. God bless for yuppie couples! And God bless the rental crisis in Tel Aviv, because no matter what they say, it's still ongoing...but let's hope it crashes significantly when we need to rent again!

Queue up in an orderly fashion please...

It's that time again. After two years of moaning, whining Yemenite tenants, we're renting our cute little pad in Tel Aviv. All because of that pesky dollar business, which has meant a serious reduction in our shekel rental income (why the fuck is this country still so tied to the dollar?). The new contract is in shekels of course, and a seriously high figure was advertised (I hid behind the sofa as the missus pressed Enter to confirm the online ad's details). Didn't stop the hordes calling. 30 people turned up for the half-hour window of opportunity we setup. And 8 of those wanted to sign up on the spot. Now we're down to two options, not sure which one to go for:

• Gay couple: He's a moshavnik, and he's a regular Tel Aviv rent-boy (I'm joking). The missus assures me they are luverly, and cuddly too. Though the missus worries that moshavniks (who live on these) are "untidy".
• College boy and aspiring actress: Nice couple, in fact, way too nice there's something fishy about 'em. Her father is a big-shot CEO of the Israeli branch of a huge international corporation, and his father is a pilot...

Eeny meeny miny moe...

Squat Me!

You have a tenant, who for the last 5 years has been paying his rent. Suddenly, he stops paying and, despite repeated promises, fails to pay. In a pow-wow to defuse the situation, he declares that the house is now his and that you can go feck yourselves. What would you do?

This is not happening to the anglosaxies fortunately, but to some good friends. I have no idea what sort of rights squatters have in Israel, but to me this screams out a get the heavies in to kick some shit out of people-like scenario...I should point out that heavies have already been sent round to intimidate, without any violence, but as the tenant is taking the piss still further, extreme measures are needed. No?

Got my mind set on you. Or you. Or maybe even YOU!

Welcome back to the jolly world of the Tel Aviv real estate market.

We are now officially on the "sent the contract" list, which means we are now one of 3 up for this small, but sexy apartment in one of North Tel Aviv's neighbourhoods. Apparently, we are also the "nicest", whatever that means. I have a feeling it's something to do with the landlord fancying my missus, but if it works, it works.

So, we are waiting for the landlord to decide which way he'll go, with references to "professional single woman not having even seen the apartment, but she wants to offer me more than anyone else..." littered throughout telephone conversations with him. Oh yeh? So go blow yourself, you greedy bastard.

But Tel Aviv is fecking crazy, no doubt about it. There are just no decent flats available, and when one pops up, it's snapped up within hours, if not minutes. And landlords are also upping their rents when they see the response to their ad, which I actually have no problem with, because, after all, the capitalist pig in me realises that supply has got to meet demand. But do me a favour, some of the places we've seen...some of these landlords are 'avin' a laugh...even a pig (capitalist or otherwise) would struggle in some of them...

"...includes spacious garden balcony"

Welcome to the world of Tel Aviv househunting...

The Irish bar(s) will have to wait...

The anglosaxy tribe will be returning to Tel Aviv...but not for another two months. We got an extension on our current place that gives us another two months, which actually helps us out A LOT. So homeless and yad2 have been given the cold shoulder for the moment, but I'm sure we'll be back there at the end of this month. Though from what I saw over the last few weeks, it's going to take some work to find the right place...there are some seriously shitty places out there going for a whole lot of dosh...

Hunting high and low

Looking for an apartment in Tel Aviv and its suburbs ain't easy. And what with Wee Lassie about to join the anglosaxy ranks (contractions have been spotted this weekend...) and our contract coming to an end at the end of this year, it's starting to get a little tight.

I think we've settled on the area we want, it's just finding the right place. Preferably before the hordes of homeless / yad2 readers get wind of it. It kind of goes against my religion, but [ spit, spit ] we're even thinking of paying a [ spit, spit ] real estate agent to find us a place. When I say "find us a place", I mean, of course, to sit on his or her arse and do absolutely fuck all, but still charge us a month's rent for his/her services.

I know, I know. But I'm a busy little bee these days, and mrs anglosaxy isn't running about too speedily, so we've got a little desperate. By the time we spot something on homeless / yad2, it's long gone. So, yes, we may become friars, or suckers. What's an anglosaxy to do...

Call me Lord, Land-lord

New tenants moved in to our place in Tel Aviv a couple of weeks ago. The week after that the plumbing went, so we had to fork out some serious dosh to fix it. But as they are paying an exorbitant sum, makes sense to keep them happy. We actually went over to see the place a few days ago, as they'd raved about the paint job they'd done. And they were right, I was almost tempted to serve notice and move straight back in!

But we're going to have to wait a little bit longer before we're actually back in Tel Aviv. Should happen by the end of this year though, because by then we'll have to be out of our place in smallsville. Looking forward to it.

Call of the Big City...

The anglosaxy reign in smallsville is coming to an end. We've had enough of closed kaspomats (cashpoints) and the limited dining/drinking options (pizza, pizza, or, er, pizza). And as my business is now standalone in smallsville and no longer based at home, we are no longer tied here. So, a couple of days ago we gave notice to the cheapskate landlord and will be moving out within 4 months. And it looks like Tel Aviv is going to be home once again...aah, I can already smell the Irish bars, sushi, and Giraffe noodles...

A photo tribute to smallsville coming soon...

Oh, and if you want to waste your time like I did yesterday, this game is for you. Bloody great! But if you get past the Bossman let me know how...not that I have any, er, time to waste...